Typo

[Atomechanical]

Just finished the game for the first time and I must say that the translation was exceptionally well done.

I did spot a few things though, apologies if these have been reported before. 
In the description of Kradel in the monster topic there appears to be a typo.  It says they are a subspecies of Radal, I'm guessing it should be Radel as that's name of monster no.6 and it's also spelt with an e in the Doradel description.

I'm not sure if the following is an error or whether Aida is simply being a senile old woman, but when you return Bob's pendant to her she says "I'm certain of it... this belongs to my son".  I'm fairly sure Bob is her grandson and at that point she thinks her grandson is dead it should probably be belonged instead of belongs.

[NightWolve]

Yup, right you are on both counts. Radal to Radel and son to grandson. Thanks.

[shades_of_blue]

found two, depending on how you look at it. not sure if anyone else has pointed them out....


SPOILER: for those who have not played though the game do not read.

NOTE: both lines are exactly as script dictates, print screen, gotta love it. should help spot these two lines easier. also, could not get an exact quote on the oh part, but the che-chester line is exact quote.



<Chester impales Dogi>

Dodi:
Che--...Chester...

Line prior to this, Dogi says 'oh', as he's stabbed. Wouldn't 'uhh...' or something similar fit better?



<Royal family is staying in Redmont>

Elizabetha:
Were it not for you, my husband would never have had this opportunity to repent of sin sins and make amends with those he has wronged.

'have had', isn't that redundant? 'had' should be removed, I think.

also, 'repent of his sins' should be 'repent for his sins'.



Lastly, much thanks to NW and Psycho DeuceBag, for all of your hard work. I enjoyed playing Felghana from start to finish and cannot wait for Napishtim's release.

[Psycho DeuceBag]

'have had', isn't that redundant? 'had' should be removed, I think.

It's not redundant. The sentence makes no sense without both words.  The alternative would have been to use a contraction ("my husband would've never had this opportunity"), which sounds too informal for a countess.

also, 'repent of his sins' should be 'repent for his sins'.

Not so.  Both are correct, but "repent of" is more common.  "Repent of" is more classic, and the McGuire clan is nothing if not devout.

As for the other... ugh.  It's a technical issue which forces the use of the same line in two very different spots. We've had to settle for a middle ground.  May just change it to "..." or the like.

[shades_of_blue]

I bow to your knowledge of old English. Guess I can’t be mentioned on the main page, for spotting a typo this time.

[NightWolve]

Guess I can’t be mentioned on the main page, for spotting a typo this time.

'fraid not, but you'll have 12 days to hunt for something else when you get the candidate release patch.

[memoryjar]

You know how in the end when Elena is talking to Adol by the dock, she said the following line:

That... that's my oath that I swear to him.

My question is, shouldn't it be swore? Since she swore the oath in the past (with reference to their current conversation). I could be wrong on this, and if so do tell.

[Psycho DeuceBag]

The intent is more that she's swearing it as she speaks.

[macroidtoe]

Graduated from college in December, finally got some time to put together my old notes, replay the game on Nightmare and grab some screenshots.  Really only found a few minor things.  I know the patch isn't actively being worked on at the moment, but I figured I'd go ahead and post them now in case I'm busy if and when things get back under way.  (I sized all these screenshots down and reduced the color depth, so they shouldn't take too long to load.)

The main deal with this one is the capitalization of "Father," which I think creates a bit of ambiguity.  The first time I saw it, the capitalization made me think that Christof was referring to Father Pierre, who also went to the ruins.  (Likewise, it would be confusing if Chester said something along the lines of "I won't be able to see Sister again."  Would he be talking about Elena, or Nell?)


Father = formal religious title.  father = family member.  For comparison, when Elena refers to Chester as "brother" rather than by name, I don't think it's capitalized.  That's my take on it anyways.

A few other occurrences:





Similarly, I don't think "milady" needs to be capitalized, since it really isn't the title of a formal position.  Although "Lady Elizabetha" probably would be, or even maybe just "the Lady."  I don't know, it starts to get into a weird gray area, and I'm not as sure on this one as I am on the "father" issue.  (It's also less important, since it doesn't create the same sense of ambiguity.)


Here, I think "red" needs to be capitalized, because it's actually being used as a name (a nickname, but a name nonetheless).




There might be other instances of "red" earlier in the game.

I think this needs to say "grandson" rather than "son," since Bob is Aida's grandson (she mentions the death of Bob's parents at some point).  Unless it's supposed to imply that the locket also belonged to Bob's father before it was passed on to Bob.


There seems to be a bit of a mismatch between these two lines:



I'm guessing it should either be "McGuire always struck me as weak-willed; I'm not surprised he consented," or "McGuire never struck me as weak-willed; I am surprised he consented."  As it stands, it sounds like Joel is not surprised that the allegedly non-weak-willed McGuire did something weak-willed.

This last one is more a matter of personal taste.  I prefer some kind of onomatopoeia for the sound of laughing, no matter how goofy ("hee hee, ha ha, ho ho") over a screenplay-style parenthetical description.  Or maybe I just don't like the word "chuckle." 


I recall that there was another instance of (chuckles) earlier in the game, and possibly a (sigh) as well (although "sigh" doesn't bug me as much, since there really isn't an onomatopoeia for it), but I forget where exactly.  I'll try to catch it next time.

All in all, fantastic work, just a few tiny capitalization things to polish out.  You've cursed me with the Falcom fever now. 

[NightWolve]

Thanks, and good work.

* The "Father" issue

I had a debate about this long ago with Psycho DeuceBag after noticing inconsistencies in capitalization and bringing it up with him. We decided for those instances it'd be capitalized. It seemed proper since the kids are royalty and speak formally, I guess. Also, the way it's sort of used as a name. Of course, if there was say a preceding pronoun as in "I just wanted to see where my father was going" you obviously wouldn't capitalize it there. Honestly, I was never 100% sure about this. But since Psycho DeuceBag has a good handle on English, he agreed it'd be OK, so I went with it.

* Red nickname issue

Hm, you might be right.

* Grandson issue

Someone caught that as well and it was fixed long time ago.

* Count McGuire issue

Hm, perhaps it needs to be retranslated/reviewed. I'm not so sure it's a mistake though, but it does seem like it's worth taking a 2nd look.

* Chuckles vs. onomatopoeia issue

It's just what Psycho DeuceBag went with this time I guess. I didn't feel strongly enough about it myself to change it. I don't see it as a big deal, but I understand others might prefer it differently.

[Kagemusha]

Out of curiosity, did I actually find real typos/mistakes when I (gwood102) sent you that text file months ago? Regardless, I beat the game for the first time recently and I must commend both of you on the fantastic job you've done.

[NightWolve]

Ah yeah, I have it - I left all your suggestions in a "to review" text file for when I would actually get back to working on the project.